Thursday, March 22

Dear Anonymous,

Dear Anonymous,

You did your job. And you did it well. If your hope was to make me feel like sh*t, well, you succeeded.  I wish I was the type of person that could brush it off and realize that you are probably a person without a lot of love in your life, without joy, and without comfort; but I can't.

What I can think of is that if you had been reading my blog for a while, you would understand that EACH and every day I worry about the choice that was made about not being able to nurse anymore. You would know that I struggle, on a daily basis, about this.  You would also know that my weight at this current moment, is something that I struggle with, too.  I've never had to worry about weight. I don't know how to eat well or exercise regularly and it has been quite hard to look at myself in the mirror each day with this extra 'baby weight' I'm carrying around.  Most nights, I get so down on myself, that I end up in tears because I feel so disgusted. 

So, thank you, for using my child's baby book as an outlet to let your anger and hatefulness land.  Thank you for making what was a TERRIBLE day on Wednesday become an even worse day from someone I don't know, but that would take the time to write such rude and hurtful things to someone you do not even know.  At least I hope you don't know me. Because, that would actually be worse. I guess.

Here are the comments left on my Hello Cereal! blog post:

Anonymous Mar 21, 2012 10:33 PM

Maybe you should not have had children since feeding them is such a burden. Lazy cow..

Anonymous Mar 21, 2012 10:35 PM

your disgusting lazy mother... damaging your baby for life with processed food not fit for rats... hope that does not keep you up at night... do society a favor... get your tubes tide so you do not make anymore stupid formula fed dumbed down babies


*This has truly made me think more about going private. I have different feelings. I know if I go private, the family who reads this blog will not be able to get to it as easily and they will not get to know about Harper as much. That part I hate. The other part, is that maybe Harper and our life should not be so open and honest on the web.  But, that's the part I love about blogging. I'm a real blogger. My life isn't perfect. No one's is, but I try and not act like it is.  And I feel that I've truly connected with others because of this and have been able to use blogging as therapy, connections made with other Moms, and a constant life-book of my baby girl's precious life. 



Oh, and Anonymous, I can assure you that my 'dumbed down' baby will be able to use you're correctly and know how to spell tied. Unlike you.

31 comments:

  1. I'm SOOO sorry that you had to read that and go through that. No one deserves to be talked to like that! You are a beautiful person and a wonderful, loving mother (from what I can tell by reading your blog, that is!!)

    I'm not sure what would cause anyone to think that would be an 'okay' thing to say. Stay strong and hold close to those who love you.

    Thank you for what you are doing to raise a wonderful, caring, thoughful, SMART, and respectful young lady!

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  2. First, this was a classy way to respond to such a coward, an illiterate coward at that. Second, please don't ever feel the need to explain the choice(s) you have made to such a coward. While I'm sure "breast is best" there are personal reasons that take this away; shame on anyone to make you feel like less than a mother. "Anonymous" coward shame on you and your ignorance!

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  3. Oh Megan, I am so so so sorry to hear this! I think it is terrible that one or two people could ruin such an adorable and honest blog. You and your family are fantastic, and I very much enjoy reading about your adventures in mommyhood. I think it is ridiculous that people are so shallow and small that they get their jollies off of posting horrible, mean things on people's blogs.

    One thing you might want to try before going private is changing your commenting capabilities. If you go to "settings" and then to "comments," the third option down allows you to choose who can comment. You can make your commenters sign in with an OpenID or just people with Google accounts. Or you can disable comments completely since you want to use this as Harper's baby book. Changing the settings might not completely get rid of the meanies, but at least you'd have access to an email account or profile so you could give them a piece of your mind. :)

    No matter what you choose, stay strong. You're a great blogger and mama!!

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  4. People can be so mean and ignorant. Really, who would post that?! I have been following your blog and love it!! You are a wonderful mom and doing such a wonderful job with Harper. Also, you are so tiny!! I think you look wonderful and wish I was as fit as you! :-) Keep up the good work Momma. That's pure evil in "anonymous". They are obviously jealous and trying to steal your joy. Oh by the way, how cowardly to hide behind an anonymous comment. Hope you and your sweet family have a blessed and wonderful night.

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  5. OMG how can people be so cruel. I'm so sorry you are getting comments like that. That's just rude. There's nothing wrong with formula feed babies. I was only able to nurse both my girls for a month before they started formula. Try not to let those rude comments bother you, I know that's harder said than done. I had an anyonomous person leave me a really rude comment so I know how you feel. Hang in there. Your beautiful & so is your daughter!!

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  6. Megan,

    I'm so sorry for the horrible comments that someone left on your blog. I love the how wonderful the internet can be, but I hate how people think writing hurtful things on the internet is okay. Your blog is so wonderful and I'm so glad that you put yourself out there. As a future-parent (hopefully in the next couple of years) I appreciate your advice and thoughts. As so many of my friends tell me, each parent must do what works for them. You and your husband are doing a fabulous job of raising a beautiful daughter.

    I would be very sad to see your blog go private, however I think you should do what is best for your family.

    Take care and God bless,

    Jeannine

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  7. Seriously?!? Ugh.
    1. You are a great mommy and wife.
    2. That person is a fool hiding behind an anonymous comments. I know words are hurtful, but don't let one idiot ruin your day.
    3. You look amazing!!! Seriously. Your body has been through an amazing thing and has created that beautiful baby girl. Remember that.
    4. Maybe think about comment moderation. I have my blog set so that I can preview all comments before posting. Just an idea.
    Hope you have a great Friday at school and a wonderful weekend with your adorable family.

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  8. I agree with everything that was said in the above comments! I am so sad to read this for you! I am thinking that it has to be a non blogger that you know personally, maybe set up an account just to read about your life in envy. People can be weird like that!! Keep your head up!!

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  9. OH. MY. GOODNESS. I am absolutely in shock that you would get that kind of comment.... especially on a post about rice cereal!! Hello.... that is not a controversial topic- usually. I am sorry that someone choose to comment on Harper's baby book and on your journey and recordings about life and motherhood. I pray that you are able to let those things roll off your back and you can take it from the kind of person that anonymous probably is. You are an excellent mommy. You feed your baby and for Harper, formula was able to settle her tummy and make her feel better. You did what was best for her, sacrificing something you really wanted to be able to do. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. You are gorgeous just as your were pre-baby and hearing you say it brings you to tears breaks my heart. Be confident in yourself and look in the mirror and then over at Harper- wow, what a gift to have in exchange for our bodies changing a little bit. Try to keep it all in perspective. I have thought about going private too- just knowing their are whack jobs out there!!! But then I think about all the Mama's I get to talk to and share ideas with through my blog. Hang in there! You are amazing- mom, wife, teacher, blogger, etc!

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  10. I cannot believe this! Don't EVER think you are a bad mother because you are far from it. This Anonymous person is obviously a coward for posting anonymously. Being a mother, let alone a working mother, is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life and I think you are doing a pretty damn good job juggling everything you have going on. Don’t let people like that get you down because you are a wonderful and amazing mom, wife, teacher, blogger and friend. Keep your head up!

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  11. Megan, from someone who doesn't know you except through this blog, I can tell you, it is clear you love your baby and want only the best for her and your family. Try not to let some opinionated person who won't even post who they are make you think you are as bad mother. I struggle with the same things, many people/moms are opinionated about what's best for YOUR kids...but remembere just that...she's YOURS!!! You do what you think best for your daughter (which if it makes you feel any better I fed both of our children rice cereal starting at 4 months and then 6 months). Don't let this person bother you!!! I know it's hard but it's not the truth. I am actually getting ready to do a bible study through an online things from Proverbs 31 ministries called "A Confident Heart: how to Stop Doubting Yourself & Live in the Security of God's Promises". It's and online study they are doing, it starts the end of April. You might think about reading it or doing the study, I always find their things very inspirational and encouraging!

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  12. Megan, from someone who doesn't know you except through this blog, I can tell you, it is clear you love your baby and want only the best for her and your family. Try not to let some opinionated person who won't even post who they are make you think you are as bad mother. I struggle with the same things, many people/moms are opinionated about what's best for YOUR kids...but remembere just that...she's YOURS!!! You do what you think best for your daughter (which if it makes you feel any better I fed both of our children rice cereal starting at 4 months and then 6 months). Don't let this person bother you!!! I know it's hard but it's not the truth. I am actually getting ready to do a bible study through an online things from Proverbs 31 ministries called "A Confident Heart: how to Stop Doubting Yourself & Live in the Security of God's Promises". It's and online study they are doing, it starts the end of April. You might think about reading it or doing the study, I always find their things very inspirational and encouraging!

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  13. Megan, I don't even know you and know you are an amazing mother!! Harper has an incredible life and it is super obvious that the person who wrote that is either A. super ghetto or B. very uneducated. That made me so sad for you. I made my blog private and it only lasted a day. I like sharing everything and being able to read blogs like yours that make me want to be such a good mom one day :) You and your husband are providing such an incredible life for your baby. There is nothing wrong with formula. My brother-in-law is a formula fed Harvard Law graduate :) That's what I always think about when I know I won't be able to breastfeed due to my job's weird hours. No worries, Megan. Also, you are beautiful! It makes me sad that you're not feeling good in your skin :( Keep your chin up!

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  14. Ummmm. Yeah. Maybe THEY are the ones that need to get their "tubes tide" for having such horrific spelling and grammar. Let's just hope they don't pass that on to THEIR offspring... YIKES! What is this world coming to? And to leave that hideousness on a TEACHER'S blog. SHAME ON THEM!

    On a more positive note... Megan, you are an AMAZING mommy! Please don't let anyone make you feel as if don't know what is best for YOUR baby. I'm sure you could pick apart parenting decisions that this particular person has made if they had enough courage to post their REAL name.
    Please know that you are a mature, RESPECTFUL, and kind-hearted person who would never seek out an opportunity to make a malicious comment on this person's blog about, say, their apparent literacy issues.
    So sorry that you had to experience this unsolicited judgement, and I'm praying that you will continue to delight all of us with your honesty and love for baby Harper :)

    JUST SAY NO TO JUDGING OTHER MOMS... WE SHOULD ALL BE SPREADING LOVE AND SUPPORT INSTEAD!! Judging others doesn't make you a better parent, it just shows that you have poor character to pass on to your own children.

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  15. um,,, who DOES THAT? want my brother to trace the pathway in the internet and find out!?!?

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  16. OH MY GOODNESS! This is outrageous. Good for you calling them out! You are a WONDERFUL mother Megan, and I hope all of these positive comments from everyone are helping reassure you of this. YOU and only YOU know what is best for you and your baby. I am seriously IN SHOCK. I'm so sorry:(

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  17. Megan,

    This is absolutely awful! Obviously these comments are from someone who has never been up all night with a colic baby who was screaming in pain. You did what was right for Harper. You should be commended for not letting foolish pride get the best of you and continuing to breastfeed although it was not was best for you and Harper.

    And to anonymous please read Matthew 22:37-39.

    Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.

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  18. Megan -- I second what everyone else is saying. The crap that person said is so asinine that it's obvious he/she just pounced around from blog to blog, leaving annoying comments for his/her own sadistic purposes. Don't let cowardly internet loserfaces get you down. You're trying to master doing it all, and I think it's amazing!!!

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  19. Megan- how horrible! I'm sure I would be taking it the exact same way... please know how many people KNOW that you do your absolute best with Harper and make your decisions based on what would be best for your family. It is so horrible that people feel like they can use other people's personal blogs to dole out unwanted criticism. Gain strength from our Savior and the people who aren't anonymous and who obviously love you very much!

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  20. I love you. I love your blog. I love beautiful, smart, healthy, happy Harper. You are doing such a wonderful job and I am lucky to have a friend like you to teach me so many wonderful mommy things for some day! I am sorry people can be stupid and mean. I am glad you are my friend and anonymous is not.

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  21. I literally teared up reading those comments and they weren't even directed at me. But as a fellow new mom, I understand how hurtful those words are. I am shocked that those things were said to you because it is so ridiculous! You obviously love your daughter and as her MOTHER you are the only one who knows what is best for you both. I am so sorry that you had to read those awful comments. Maybe you can set your comments settings so nobody anonymous can comment here. Anonymous comments are usually made by cowards who really don't have anything better to do than to try and make someone else feel horrible about themselves. I know, it's happened to me too. Just please, don't listen to them. You are a great mom! I can tell just from reading your blog how much you care about your girl. Hang in there!!

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  22. Wow! What a jerk! If Gerber rice cereal is sooo bad then why is it made and sold in stores & recommended by pediatricians??? Our doctor had us start on it at 3months. And I had to stop BF after 2 weeks due to Jay having eating problems that were out of our control (I documented it on my blog but recently reposted about it due to some unkind remarks I've gotten from strangers). I swear, half these people being judgemental towards parents & what their kids eat don't even have children!

    I know it's hard & angering but don't let em get to you - you're doing just fine! There's nothing wrong with rice cereal, baby food and formula - it's actually a lot better now than it was when we were babies, it's come a long way!

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  23. Oh my.... NO WAY! I can't believe someone would ever take time out of their day to be so miserable to a complete stranger! Honestly! I am soooo sorry that those words were aimed at you :(
    Please try to ignore them! You are GORGEOUS and I'm sure you're a great momma (I just found your blog or else I'd praise you even more, ha ha!) Here's the thing... I KNOW how it feels to look in the mirror and be completely disgusted with yourself. I use to sit and cry in front of the mirror and just think about how much I hated myself until my hubs caught me... what a wake up call! That's when I started to get things in order. But something I forgot through that trial was that I am a daughter of GOD! And so are you! Yes, we go in and out of looking our best, being over weight, having acne, etc. But no matter what we are LOVED! And our men are attracted to us no matter what. You will figure out what work outs are great for you and what foods to cut out... until then? Ignore those crummy comments and just work on being HAPPY!

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  24. Thats just sad.. That someone would put you and your child down like that! Jealously has to suck :(. I hope you're having a much better day :)

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  25. Megan, anyone who reads this blog knows you are a TERRIFIC mom to sweet Harper!! I am the same way with not being able to brush things off so I know it is easier said than done, but these comments come from a nasty person who doesn't even know you..... they have no right to judge you. Don't let them win by upsetting you.... you know YOUR daughter and what is best for her! You are her parent and you will do what you know is right for her, not what some low-life thinks is right.

    And if it's any consolation, I look forward to your posts and every one of them gives me major baby fever :) The way you talk about parenthood is so beautiful and you can tell Harper is one lucky baby to have such wonderful parents! Praying for you my sweet friend!

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  26. Okay I obviously just started reading your blog but OH MY WORD. Who would say something like that?! What a terrible comment to recieve :-( I am so sorry someone decided to be so ugly and hurtful!

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  27. Megan,
    My eyes stung with tears when I read this. I am so sorry that someone so mean and hateful would leave such a comment on your blog. You are a beautiful momma, and doing an amazing job! I too have considered making my blog private for similar reasons. People can be so mean. Hugs to you and your sweet family. Keep up the blogging, we love to read it :)

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  28. Megan, You are obviously a wonderful mother! I am so sorry someone could be so, so cruel. I love reading your blog and as a new mom myself, I so appreciate your honesty. Hugs!

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  29. Whoa! That is extremely harsh and unnecessary comments that someone sent you. I am so sorry Megan. I know we only met once (many years ago) through a mutual friend, but I hope you know you are a wonderful person and passionate, caring mother and wife. I am disgusted by this person's comments. I love reading your blog and hearing how your family and life have blossomed. You're a great blogger and genuine - that's why I enjoy your blog. Continue simply being you. Your followers all love you.

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  30. Oh my gosh. I cannot believe someone would leave such a horrible comment like that. You are beautiful and have a beautiful, healthy baby girl! The Anonymous person is probably just jealous, but he/she needs to get a life and stop bothering you.

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  31. Hey there! I'm a brand new follower, but I just wanted to say I'm so sorry for people like that! I, too, am someone who lets stuff like this get to me, and especially when it's something concerning me role as a mother or a wife. What type of person would try to tear you down like that?! Obviously, someone not worth wasting your time worrying about! You are a wonderful mom, and you have an adorable baby girl! Don't listen to the crazy people out there!

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Thanks for taking the time to comment! I love hearing positive comments from you!

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